Monday, July 20, 2009

The Hill

Of all my parents' children it was I who lived the most years with them on The Hill. Forty years ago this summer my family moved to that place my folks still call home. I left for college, then for a short-term out-of-state job, and to live alone in an apartment, all the while spreading wings which were formed in my wild home. Between wanderings I returned to regroup in the nest that nurtured me until confident wings took flight for good.

The Hill, as it is affectionately called by those of us who've lived there, was my friend, my teacher, and sometimes even my foe. In roaming its face I discovered contemplation and solitude and the benefits to be had in letting nature and seasons envelop me. Hiking through wildflowers - buttercups, Queen Anne's lace, wild roses and flowers whose names I do not know - a trusting of cycles formed. Growing, dying, growing anew, resting, reproduction, steadfastness. Beauty. Strength. And courage.




My cousin, Denny, artfully cut two roads on the hill before my uncle, aunt, and parents began to build. Should he make a pilgrimage to the hill I think he'd be pleased to see how well those paths have done their jobs! The lower road became my first running track. I remember the first morning as a mid-teen when I'd donned sweats for the first time, walked down to the dirt road, stretched to warm-up, climbed over the gate, and began to run. It was a cool early summer morning, the grass was wet, the sky was clear blue, and the cows watched me while they chewed their cud. I sweat. I smiled. I did it!

As the years rolled on I ran in rain, in mud, in summer's heat. My ankles became strong from encountering uneven terrain, my legs and balance improved from sliding on mud while staying upright, and my calves and thighs became accustomed to springing me over the occasional cowpie or poison oak clump. A confidence grew that has served me well all these years.

This past weekend Tom and I traveled to the hill to help Mom and Dad cut firewood and trim tree limbs too close to the house. Mom and I provided refreshment, encouragement, and hot meals while the 'boys' reveled in logging.





It was the most pleasant weekend I can recall in a long time back in the arms of my parents and the hill. Dad worked hard, pleased with the progress he and Tom made. Mom was more like her old self since her health took her into a strange place last summer. She was spunky - in a good way - strong, alert, as if she has finally awakened to herself again. She even went outside on her own without her walker to water her flowers which surprised Dad. She looked at him like, "So what's the big deal? They're thirsty." I drove Mom out to the point where the guys were cutting wood and she said excitedly, "I haven't been out here in years!" Her eyes brightly surveyed the scene. While I snapped photos and served lemonade she sat on the tailgate and watched the men cut firewood with a contentment that softened the edges of what has been a very long year.

Mom is back. Once again the hill worked its magic! Dry summer grasses waved greetings, breezes gently caressed Mom's skin, delicate-looking flowers greeted her eyes, tall evergreens directed their aroma to her senses, the sun dappled through the mossy oaks energizing a woman who still has fire in her belly and the determination to care for this land she calls home and let it sustain her for as long as God wills.


And Dad? He worked hard and felt supreme satisfaction that he could still - with Tom's help - maintain the safety of his home and harvest his own firewood. He looked at the piles of wood they'd created with relief and a bit of pride.






None of us knows what the future holds but we do know this, that within life's struggles are lessons valuable and necessary and unique to each of us. Persistence is the key.

Always, always, always determine to get back up.

Friday, July 17, 2009

One Moment

One moment to stop, sit on the porch beside freshly watered lawn, unclench jaws and hands, relax my face, breathe deeply.

One moment to catch the perfect gliding of a circling bald eagle overhead in a pale blue sky. Three time slowly around and away he soars. My heart cheers his confident movement, his expertise. Inspiration.

One moment to hear the buzzing wings of a hummingbird, turn my head and witness the level sipping. How can he appear so calm when parts of him are frenetic blurs? Delight.

One moment to smile as a dragonfly hovers and dives and helicopters round and round seemingly tempted by my red shirt, daring closer and closer but finding another distraction to lure him on to new paths. Amusement.

One moment to marvel yet again at a V of honking geese, flying north to another pond or river or lake, sloppy formation as if the heat took perfection's care away. What does it matter? Getting there, that's the goal. Instinct.

One moment between this and that, between attention here and there, between the doings. One moment to be. Just be.

I prayed for joy, for contentment, for energy, and for recollecting the reasons I thrill at being alive.

And God sent me one moment.

Renewal.

Saturday, July 11, 2009

Flicker in a Dark Place

Like I'm a step and a half behind, or unable to see and hear clearly, slightly off-balance, dizzy I am out of sync with the rest of the universe.

Fumbling along. Frustrated. Stupid.

But, even though I feel out of it I know that life continues on. The garden teaches me this. I merely water. Every day. I don't even notice the new fruits until one day I look and sure enough, there they are. They've been growing all this time whether I notice or not, whether I feel synced up with the process or not.


I suppose I am growing, too. And the fruit will be noticed.

One day.

Wednesday, July 01, 2009

Good Wife - Sheesh

A friend sent me a website rhapsodizing about the good old days, the early 50's mostly, before I was born, and the mid-50's when I was born.

Included was this:
The type is small I know, so I'll take the time to type it out. Then, I'd love it if you shared your response with me. (Curious? While some of the suggestions I consider common courtesy for husband, wife, or child, I found myself shocked by a lot of it. And then I was happy the women's movement arrived when I did to save from me a life that would have made me suicidal. Cassie said, "Well, that was obviously written by a man." I might add, a narcissistic, possibly cheating man.)

Okay, here we go:
The Good Wife's Guide

1. Have dinner ready. Plan ahead, even the night before, to have a delicious meal ready, on time for his return. This is a way of letting him know that you have been thinking about him and are concerned about his needs. Most men are hungry when they come home and the prospect of a good meal (especially his favourite dish) is part of the warm welcome needed. [So far so good.]

2. Prepare yourself. Take 15 minutes to rest so you'll be refreshed when he arrives. Touch up your make-up, put a ribbon in your hair and be fresh-looking. He has just been with a lot of work-weary people.

3. Be a little gay and a little more interesting for him. His boring day may need a lift and one of your duties is to provide it. [Duty? Be a little MORE interesting?]

4. Clear away the clutter. Make one last trip through the main part of the house just before your husband arrives. [Oh, yes, the king doth approach.]

5. Gather up schoolbooks, toys, paper etc. and then run a dustcloth over the tables. [Dust the freakin' tables? Everyday?]

6. Over the cooler months of the year you should prepare and light a fire for him to unwind by. Your husband will feel he has reached a haven of rest and order, and it will give you a lift, too. After all, catering for his comfort will provide you with immense personal satisfaction. [Immense personal satisfaction. Don't light a fire because you and the children might enjoy it, wait for his royal highness, then find your satisfaction in catering to him.]

7. Prepare the children. Take a few minutes to wash the children's hands and faces (if they are small), comb their hair and, if necessary, change their clothes. They are little treasures and he would like to see them playing the part. Minimize all noise. At the time of his arrival, eliminate all noise of the washer, dryer, or vacuum. Try to encourage the children to be quiet. [Little treasures playing their parts? No wonder my generation is messed up.]

8. Be happy to see him. [If you have to be advised to do this, there are serious problems that food, fire, and a ribbon won't help.]

9. Greet him with a warm smile and show sincerity in your desire to please him. [Huh? How does one do this? Show sincerity in your desire to please him? Are we to fake a smile and fake sincerely desiring to please him because if we sincerely desire to please him this whole step is redundant? Ah, this explains a LOT.]

10. Listen to him. You may have a dozen important things to tell him, but the moment of his arrival is not the time. Let him talk first - remember, his topics of conversation are more important than yours. [Grrr.....yeah, sure, any topics I bring up such as personal business, the children's needs, the car blew up on I-5 but I only broke my pelvis, and 'by the way, I may be pregnant again' are not as important as his 'manly' topics.]

11. Make the evening his. Never complain if he comes home late or goes out to dinner, or other places of entertainment without you. Instead, try to understand his world of strain and pressure and his very real need to be at home and relax. [Is this mutual? Can the wife ditch the dude? I mean, she has a world of stress and pressure - a bunch of kids, er, um treasures - he can't even deal with and a mother-in-law from the underworld.]

12. Your goal: Try to make sure your home is a place of peace, order, and tranquility where your husband can renew himself in body and spirit. [This is a good one, I applaud this, but not just for the man, for everyone who enters the home; family, friend, neighbor, invited stranger.]

13. Don't greet him with complaints and problems. [Another good one. It's a common courtesy we can all share with one another to respect the tired among us.]

14. Don't complain if he's late home for dinner or even if he stays out all night. Count this as minor compared to what he might have gone through that day. [Holy smokes. Yeah, leave the lady to stay on her shift of caregiving for the kids, answering the phone, dealing with the same stuff she's been faced with all day, and now explaining to the kids and whomever why he's out and she's subbing for him. Huh uh.]

15. Make him comfortable. Have him lean back in a comfortable chair or have him lie down in the bedroom. Have a cool or warm drink ready for him. [Frankly, I was nervous about where this was gonna go. But then I remembered, it was the 50's and people just didn't talk about that.]

16. Arrange his pillow and offer to take off his shoes. Speak in a low, soothing and pleasant voice. [Hmm. Same thing one does for a crabby baby.]

17. Don't ask him questions about his actions or question his judgment or integrity . Remember, he is the master of the house and as such will always exercise his will with fairness and truthfulness. You have no right to question him. [Yes, it really says that!]

18. A good wife always knows her place. [Firmly under the sole of her husband's royal shoe.]
Thank God the times changed!

Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Jonas and Bonus: Portland Part Three

Ben, a bit on the weary side from a long photo shoot in Seattle the day before, came over to visit us after we had breakfast.


We lounge around while Tom checks us out of the hotel.


A wonderful son! His smile always cheers me.


Ben gave us a mini-tour of the off-beat and interesting things near our hotel. First stop, the Voodoo Doughnut shop, a favorite haunt of locals.


Weird decor, unusual doughnut flavors, and friendly counter-culture employees made this quite an adventure.


So many items to choose from!


We decided to buy the Voodoo Dozen and let the shop pick our selections. (Yes, we ended up with 13. I took this as the guy was loading up the pink box.) We each took bites from every flavor - like a bizarre wine tasting only we didn't swish and spit. Bubblegum (pink one in picture) was gross, but the grape (not pictured) was tasty. The one with the orange frosting in the picture had a nutmeg and orange flavor. Quite good.


A thoughtful reminder that sorrow exists and we who are in good places are better people to remember and honor.


After a quick stroll though the Saturday Market we drove over to Powell's Bookstore, the biggest, funkiest bookstore I've ever been in. I've purchased used books online but have never been to an actual store.


A map is necessary in order to find the topic one is looking for as there are three floors encompassing nine huge 'rooms' Amazing!

"There is simply no place in America like Powell's. No bookstore is so big or so meticulously organized, and none has such a psychic hold on so large a community." ~~ John Balzar, Los Angeles Times
I found good prices on two Italian language reference books and Cassie and Caroline found some children's books written in French for reading practice. We reigned ourselves in, but it was oh, so hard. Getting away with a few language books was getting off easy. Forget the kid in the candy store, man, leaving here was torture!


Loving all things Italian, of course we had to duck into this gelato cafe for a tiny sampling.


Again with the decisions! I went with an authentic Italian sweet cream flavor. Warm day + cold gelatto = MMMM!




The above photos were taken at OMSI (Oregon Museum of Science and Industry) where we'd taken in an IMAX movie and snooped around the museum on Saturday afternoon. The last photo is of the giant projector used for the IMAX movies, the black vertical lines are the huge film ascending and descending as the movie plays. We watched Adrenaline Rush - and it was!

Portland is a beautiful city. Both Tom and I have lived there in the past at different times. Fun to visit in friendly weather.

It's good to be home again in our smaller berg where the air is noticeably fresher, the tempo slower, the green spaces plentiful, and the living easy.

Hope you enjoyed my showing and telling of the adventure!

Now we gear up for our annual Fourth of July party here at home. Friends coming over, Tom's got a new bbq ribs recipe he's going to try out, and more!

Gotta love summer!

Jonas and Bonus: Portland Part Two

After the concert we slept at The Benson Hotel, built in 1912. Beautiful, historic place. Comfortable beds! Wow! Tom and I slept great, waking up before six. The girls continued to dream peacefully so we parents quietly dressed and headed for the streets to watch the city awaken.


A 12 story, world-class hotel built in 1912 by Simon Benson, a Portland lumber baron and philanthropist, the Benson was designed by the city's most prominent architect of the day, Albert E. Doyle.


The interior walls and pillars of the magnificent lobby are finished in rare, now extinct, Circassian walnut imported from the forests of Imperial Russia. Beautiful! Austrian crystal chandeliers and sweeping Italian marble staircases with cast iron railings add to the hotel's grandeur. I took a million photos but will spare you.




While the girls slept Tom and I headed to Peet's for something warm and something delicious. We were not disappointed.




The U.S. National Bank is a beautiful old building! I LOVE pillars like this.


What do you think this statue represents? My first inclination is that it's a child bent over, head deep into a toy chest. Any ideas? Your guess is as good as mine. Tom saw an arm with a boxing glove.




Serene early morning moments.


This is the Wells Fargo building. If you look closely you can see the words Wells Fargo high up on the top under the eaves, the letters in circles, one word on each wall.




Amazing to walk the streets of Portland when empty of people and cars.


Good ol' China Town.


By the time Tom and I returned from our leisurely exploration the girls were awake. They met us in the London Grill, the upscale over 50 year old restaurant which is tucked below the Grand Lobby of the Benson. Easy for Caroline - with her mending broken foot and crutches - to leave our room on the fourth floor, enter the elevator, press London Grill LL, and have the doors open to opulence and mouth-watering gourmet breakfast aromas. Oh, the delicious food!


While we ordered plated breakfasts of homemade sausages, bagels, berries, fruit, ham, eggs, hash browns, toast, and juices these desserts were near our table and very tempting. They were part of a lavish buffet brunch that was to be available later in the morning. Our food was amazing!


Tom nearly nabbed one of these chocolate covered berries on the way out!

These photos depict the early part of our Sunday in Portland. My next post will show the rest of the morning and afternoon when Ben joins us and gives us a tour of some of the local favorite places in the vicinity.

Stay tuned...

Jonas and Bonus: Portland Part One


The long-awaited trip to Portland to see the Jonas Brothers has come and gone but the memories linger. So do the smiles. I'll let the photos do the talking.


In the car on the trip up. Giggles. So very many giggles. As it should be.


In front of the Jonas Brothers Bus. At last.


We all signed the side of the big rig, Caroline first.


Before we were ushered into the stadium a trivia contest was held outside the Rose Quarter. Cassie knows the answer!!


Caroline won a guitar pick necklace. She thinks the crutches helped her be chosen. The crutches also allowed us to enter through a special door for the physically disabled. Never have we had so many tweens and teens give us nasty looks as we breezed ahead of the loooong line and into the building.


There was one of those big screens like the ones celebrities stand in front of to have their picture taken at gala events. Cassie and Caroline hammed it up. "Oh yeah!"


Jonas Brothers STUFF!


The girls with the guys. Sort of...


The stage!


Nick on the Jumbotron. After this I put my camera away and enjoyed the show. Jordan Sparks was the opener as well as Honor Society and a girl group from Korea called Wonder Girls.


After the concert, riding the high!

The talented men put on a fantastic concert. High energy, very professional, and clean. Enjoyable for all. I particularly liked when they sang Sweet Caroline, the Neal Diamond classic. Of course, Caroline liked it, too! Most of the songs are written by the brothers who also play a variety of instruments. All genuine musicians and respectful, likable guys. Good combination, and rare these days.

A great way to spend a Saturday night together as a family!