Saturday, September 09, 2023

Surprising Grace - Revisited (First Published September 13, 2010)

An ominous storm blacks out the entire sky ahead as I drive the car to the repair shop early this morning. The  Coastal Mountain Range in the far west - north to south - bears the weight of the dense disturbance. 

Still embraced by the eastern morning blue that thus far cheers my drive, I grip my steering wheel in anticipation of encountering the looming darkness.

"The only way to receive the help I need for my car is to enter that blustery unknown. The solution lies there."

First instincts are to find a way around, to avoid, to wait out the storm. But the appointment is today. Now is the time. This I can do. This I will do.

Just like any unexpected ordeal in life, the obstacle must be confronted, for enlightenment lies therein - or beyond. Difficulty must be braved. Willingness to be taught or rescued or strengthened or rebuked motivates. 

As is natural for my brain, an analogy is derived from my surroundings. The painful prayer of a recent crisis - a dark night of my soul - echos in my mind: "I trust you, God, though my legs feel boneless, my muscles merely rubber. I know you will make something beautiful out of this miserable situation. But, oh God, I need your help, need you to go before me. I cannot see a way out." In time, surprising grace rained down on my fragile courage, my frail trust, my on-the-brink brokenness. Peace that transcended comprehension. 

The Master Creator sculpts beauty from life's debris. All he requires from me is a willing mind, a trusting heart, however small and weak.  

While this morning's dark cloud situation is simple, my heart rejoices at its reminder of the innumerable shadow-lessons through which God escorts me, most of which are incredibly worse than a heavily-clouded dawn. His grace is evident through all. Grace that illuminates meaning. "There. There is the reason. There is the beauty. There is love, the greatest gift of all."

I am never alone.

Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. ~~Philippians 4: 6,7

Friday, September 01, 2023

Discovering My Purpose in the World

You'd think at my age I'd know my purpose.

I suppose I always have - sort of. We all subconsciously act on our purpose in relationships and also within our homes and spheres of influence, to a degree. But there is more. So much more.

August was designated as a rest month, calendar kept free. It was good for me. In it were choices that put my health and needs first. Revitalizing for my mind and heart and soul.

In small ways. But maybe those small ways are the largest connections of all.

I discovered that I am not invisible. No one is.

In that revelation a choice presented itself. Within the realm of free will, what effects shall my life offer the world? 

Some answers came to mind. They please me, excite me, challenge me.


I want to be a bright spot in a dreary world and an interesting spot in a lively world. God will use my willingness, I just know He will. 

I want to be strength and steadfastness in this uncertain world, experience and its wisdom, the wisdom of the ages and the wisdom of my  own age.

I want to represent the glory of growing older, to exhibit the same beauty I see in a an ancient red-tiled roof with its useful old chimney under a cloudy sky brightened with fiery autumn gold, the dying leaves ever more beautiful than their younger forms.

God grant me the mind to embrace these purposeful choices.

It's a start. It's a start.


I started to be free when I discovered that the cage was made of thoughts.