Saturday, July 12, 2008

Together Again

My very kind, compassionate, patient, generous brother and sister-in-law have offered their newish home with it's king-sized guest bedroom and open floor plan for the caregiving of our Mom and Dad. The limitations of my parents' home - too narrow doors, too many twists and turns - are not present in my brother's house. It makes all the difference in the timeline. My brother and his wife are welcoming our folks into their home to share their lives for as long as is necessary.

Because of this gesture Mom won't have to wait until August 15th but gets to bust out of the rehab center this Thursday - that is the plan. And Dad gets a much deserved rest from all that he has been through.

Medical equipment is being put in place, furniture moved around, phone calls being made. It's the perfect solution for Mom's transitional phase, the strengthening of her body so she can return to her beloved home. Mom's therapists are thrilled at this opportunity. Happy for Mom to be freed to live with her loved ones once again.

Dad is happy - joyous! - that he will be united full-time with his wife of sixty years. This has been extremely hard for him, to watch, to wait, to not know. To just not know.

And Mom is excited to be able to rejoin the 'real world' once again. Back in the fresh air and love that have missed her so.

I'm so proud of my brother and sister-in-law for demonstrating what it means to be 'family.' Their unselfish gesture speaks volumes. It won't be easy for any of them, but a routine will be recognized, and humor found in those odd little places and spaces of daily life. They are not alone; there are many of us who support and help where we can.

Words are not coming to me now, the right words, the sentiments that communicate my heart. This is love, this unprompted generosity. It's unselfish. It's humble and heartfelt. It's true...and it's an example for all to witness. Where aggressive pride and loud self-seeking have failed, love has tip-toed in on whispers of genuine compassion and care...and saved the day.

(The photos are not current - just happy reminders of what we hope is returning to us. Happy, contented parents.)


Marianne Elixir said...

This is truly moving news. Truly love. Thank you for sharing the good news, and thank you to your brother and sister-in-law for unintentionally exhorting us to a greater understanding of what it means to love one another.

tshsmom said...

My folks just celebrated their 58th anniversary. They, too, would be totally lost without each other!

This is a huge task that your brother's family has taken on. What an amazing family you have, Cherie!

This situation would never work with my parents. They have stated, in no uncertain terms, that they would NEVER move in with us. Fortunately, we only live 1 1/2 blocks away, so we're close enough to keep an eye on them.

Cherie said...

M. E. - You are so eloquent. I love the way you stated it - you have the words I was looking for. Thanks.

Tshs: I wish we lived closer to my folks. My sister lives the closest to my parents and she's 50 miles away. My brother and I are 100 miles away in opposite directions, so while we are able to visit and help a little, constant, daily care isn't possible. That's why it's so cool what my brother is doing. I'm glad that your folks have you and L nearby to keep an eye on them.

It's a new and different stage of life, isn't it?!

Sandy's Notes said...

Every step seems to be forward for your mom Cherie, I'm so happy for her. This is great for your mom; I know being in those rehabs can be a little depressing.

Mike S said...

Thanks to your family her rehab will be completed in record time. She just seems the type who will push the limits until she gets where she wants to be, at least that's what I read into your posts. The world needs many more folks like your family:)

Anonymous said...

So happy for you all. Today is our 63rd anniv.and I can't help but wonder what we would do if we were in this situation. Love - Aunt Joyce

Cherie said...

Sandy, thanks for all your encouragement along the way!

Mike, yes, she's that type who doesn't take 'no' for an answer. Thanks for the kind remarks!

AJ - Happy Anniversary!!! You inspire on a daily basis, more than you'll ever know. And, I know what you'd do in this situation - the same thing we've all done, which is take it one day at a time, loving each other through it all.